January 20, 2015

40 Days ~ final days

(40 days is a series of posts that began on November 4th. If you are interested in reading them in order, scroll down - otherwise read on and check out all my other musings...)

The last ten days of my 40 day journey from fear to faith became magical. This isn't to say I didn't continue to have days of faking it or days of not wanting to meditate. However, the desire to continue to move forward, to do what ought to be done, to strive relentlessly toward my best self, won out.

We hear a lot of that phrase "be your best self." What does this mean? Is it a crazy catch phrase that sells magazines? Some woo woo in the stars, incense burning bullshit that if we play along with brings forth a unicorn and a million bucks on our doorstep?  Nope. It's none of this.

At the end of the day, being your best self is finding that quiet place inside you, listening to it, feeling it, acting from it and knowing that you are loved - exactly as you are. It's knowing no matter what the outside circumstances, in the end, all is well. All is well in crisis, all is well in joy. Why? Because you have faith. You have every bit of everything you ever need inside you - that is the divinity within you, your grace, your soul, your true self.

When my consciousness started to shift toward this faith, this place of true self, I noticed my life changing. I noticed more calmness. I noticed less judgement. I noticed more loving kindness. I noticed more good things coming my way - not that good things hadn't come my way before, but now, I was noticing ALL the darn good that is constantly around me. Flowing toward me. Not only was it coming AT me, I was barreling toward IT!

In fact, while feeling this flow of abundance and goodness, I had courage to reach out and apply for a job. Something I've been wanting to do for a while, but kept putting it off. I interviewed, and received an offer for said job! Me! Stay at home mom, me!!  The outcome is that I did not accept the final offer - HOWEVER, my point is that due to my shift in consciousness, my ability to take action and my openness to receiving all things good, this job came to me. It was proof to me that when we put our best selves out there, we get so very much in return.

My best self does things from a place of peace, not confusion. Even if the outcome isn't what I desired, that's alright. It's not about the outcome, but the journey that leads you to it. Sometimes the outcome is one you want, sometimes it isn't. It's in these cases the next journey begins. When our choices are made from a place of confidence and authenticity, we tend not to second guess, ask a thousand friends for their opinions or worry about the final outcome. We turn freely toward our decisions and rest in grace knowing we did good.

At the end of the day, at the end of the final days of my self proclaimed 'journey,' I feel lighter, calmer and grounded. I feel more whole, more quiet yet beyond energized. All is well. All is well.

Next post ~  my final thoughts on 40 days and what happens next...


don said...

Such truth stated here neen and really well stated. I have taken great inspiration from your words and battling depression I need to deal in the manner of gratitude and being the light. THANK YOU!

RD Robertson said...

Thanks for the inspiration.I am really happy to read your posts. It is too informative.